Merry Christmas....and to all a good night!

Just popping in to wish everyone in blogland a very Merry Christmas!!

I hope you all have a blessed Christmas Eve night and a Christmas Day filled with love, peace, and joy.

Thank you all for being such a wonderful community. I am blessed to have found friends here!

xoxoxo,

Maggie

I asked for it...and Ella's meme

Today I sat on a warm behind all day.

I actually asked for this spanking- and got it! 

I woke up this morning knowing I had to focus at work today. I've been slacking off lately. I get my work done, but not as fast as I could. Well, I have some files to go through and I knew I'd more than likely find myself procrastinating by looking at my phone. So, I asked TBG this morning if he would spank me to help me focus - and he did! Whew, I forgot how hard that man's hand is!!

Even now as I write this hours later I can still feel the slight burn. I love it though. Makes me feel loved. And I love the loving that always follows! I'm thinking the whole "asking for a reason" may work for the time being. He didn't seem to have an issue with me asking at all. 

Anyway! I'm finally getting time to post answers to Ella's meme from this past week! It was a long week - we had a lovely Thanksgiving (which we host) and then we had a wake and funeral for TBG's uncle who passed away. That was a hard one emotionally. We opened our little house to nearly 50 people after the funeral...I couldn't believe we fit everyone in! But I'm so glad we did it and TBG's Aunt was so thankful. 

Without further ado...here are my answers:

1.  Have you ever said something rude to a doctor during childbirth?

No, I don't recall. I did however feel like I was going to rip the nurse's head off her shoulders when, after 21 hours of labor with my daughter, she told me I wasn't pushing hard enough. Hubby actually told me later he thought I was going to punch her. 

2.  Have you ever seen someone pop their eye out?

Ugh. No. And I'm so glad I haven't!

3.  Had your stomach pumped?

Nope! I do remember my sister telling me she ate rat poison when she was little and they pumped her full of vitamin k and made her throw up. Poor kid.

4.  Been to a drag show with a very large gay man?

Oh, I only wish! Gay men are the FUNNIEST!! That would be a riot.

5.  Eaten a worm?

No, not that I recall. However I probably would have done it if I had been triple-dog dared.

6.  Run a nifty, little money-making business when you were 11-12 years old, buying girlie mags for the neighborhood boys?

Umm, that would be a no. Ella was definitely an early entrepreneur.

7.  Crawled through an underground storm sewer?

Again, no. It totally reminds me of The Outsiders for some reason. I could see myself doing that when I was about 10, given the opportunity.  I was a complete tomboy.

8.  Lied about your weight?

Every day, people. Every. Day. 

I feel the number on that scale is a lie. 

9.  Needed your husband to help you up the stairs because you were so inebriated?

No, it was usually the other way around. However, there was that time in college I passed out in a puddle....

10.  Seen a movie star in an airport?

Well, seeing as I haven't been in an airport since I was 15....that would be a no. Lol.

11.  Walked out of a movie?

I've wanted to a few times, but never did. I did fall asleep during the movie Seven. I hated that movie.

12.  Sat on a jury?

No! The one time I was picked in the pool the defendant pleaded out before there could be a trial. 

13.  Told a child "because I told you so?"

Oh yes. Nearly every day at one point. I started out trying not to, but explaining your reasoning to a child just doesn't always work out. 

14.  Ran a cash register in a small grocery store when you were 8?

Nope.  At 8 I was planning on being the world's first female horse jockey. That vocation did not last!

15. Wrote a eulogy for a parent?

I actually did write my dad's eulogy but I wasn't the one to give it. I just didn't think I could get through reading it. 

16.  Heard a song you were sure was written and sung just for you?

I don't think I've ever felt it was written for me...but there have been a few in my life that feel like I could have written them. 

17.  Roasted chestnuts over an open fire?

I have not. I'm not a big fan of nuts, unless they are attached to...oh, that may be a little risqué!

18.  Eaten 44 shrimp in one sitting?

You know....I've never counted. I do like shrimp, but I'm not sure that I could have eaten that many.  My son could. He's a shrimpaholic.

19. Thrown all phones in a drawer for the entire weekend?

Wow.  No, can't say that I have. It sounds heavenly (even though I would probably have to go thru detox first).

20. Gone on a vacation by yourself?

No and I'm not sure if I could. We don't get many vacations, so I would feel guilty not going with everyone. However, I could use a day and a night to myself just to read.

Aaaand done!! That was so much fun, Ella! Thanks for the questions.

I truly hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend - or, just a fabulous weekend if you don't celebrate it!

xoxo

Maggie

Happy Thanksgiving!

Just a quick note to wish everyone celebrating today a Happy Thanksgiving!!

May your turkey be moist (even if you hate that word!) and may your stuffing be delightful. May you be thankful for all those at your table and for those who could not be there. 

And may you not get any bad girl spankings....but some good girl ones, if you wish!! 

xoxoxo,

Maggie

Where do I start?

My....so much has happened in the past few months while I've been quiet. So much has happened in just the past weekend. 

I didn't start out to be quiet on blogland and the TTWD front. It just happened somehow. Mid-summer just started a free-fall of children having practices and then school began and we rolled with that and all the football games that ensued. And are still going on. Not to mention our DD is a senior in high school (when did THAT happen?!??) so we've got all the fun stuff like pictures and the lot happening. I feel like I'm a hamster in a wheel right now. 

And now this weekend. Paris. Lebanon. Other locations that were hit with either forces of nature or forces of terrorism. It's been a horrible weekend. We found out TBG'S uncle will not be coming home from hospice and may be passing within the next day or so.  It wasn't something we expected this quickly. My 13-yr old son was in the room when Uncle began to moan and it caused him much heartache and tears ensued as he didn't know how to help Uncle or Auntie, for that matter. Another death in the family is not something we are looking forward to. DD mentioned that we have had one death a year for the past 11 years in our family. And she is correct. It comes from having a large, old family. But it has been a hard thing for my children to live through...the death of so many loved ones. I pray that Uncle goes peacefully and quickly for his sake. 

As to TTWD it is still here. We are still trying but there have been no true spankings for a few months. I am nearly at wits end with how much I need it. Require it. I have tried talking with TBG and he says yes, we are still doing it. And yes, he knows he needs to do more spanking. But it just doesn't happen. I even wrote him a letter, hoping that he would understand I fully support him in this and to not worrying he is doing it right or wrong. To just do it! I bet Nike wouldn't care for that picture with their slogan, LOL. It's difficult being between a rock and a hard place....knowing you need it but afraid that asking too much for it will seem like trying to control it. 

But, I will keep on with it. Because I need to be better at my submission. When thinking upon it, I have not been very good at what I need to be doing. I was falling back into pre-Maggie. Not good. So, I'm trying to find some kind of 30 days of submission things I can do - like, acts that will enhance my submission or make me think a little deeper on it. I have started making sure that dinner is on the table for him because he works later  hours than me. That makes me - and him- feel better. 

I hope everyone else's lives have been fabulous while I was gone! It took me a whole week or two just to catch up on a the blogs I missed!! And yes, I did read them all! I love the bloggers out here!

xoxo

Maggie 

Settling In

I've meant to blog for a week or two now. Each time I would start, I'd stop shortly after. Almost like this new beginning was just meant to be for us.

The two of us. 

Nobody else.

I feel like I've been hiding away, trying to reserve all these good feelings and happy moments to myself. To only savor them with TBG. 

I'm not sure why. Perhaps it's because we've had so little time to ourselves over the last 17 years since we started having kids. Perhaps it's because we have had so little of things that are "ours"...for just the two of us lovers. 

In fact, for so many years I feel we forgot that we were lovers. And that's sad. Hindsight is 20/20, you know. I wish I could go back and change things, start DD at least 10 years earlier, maybe more. But, alas, I cannot. We can only go forward. And I am determined that forward is full of "our thing" as TBG calls it. I think he is determined for that to happen, too. Which makes me just squirm in delight. 

I haven't had any more spankings after the first two. Oh, a couple of little love taps here and there while we are being frisky. But no real spankings. I wish I could say it's because I've been such a good girl (and don't you know I just melt when he calls me that?). It's been busy for TBG around here so I think there just hasn't been time. But I'm getting antsy over it. 

I don't feel I purposely do things to require a spanking. However, I do need guidance and to sometimes be reminded that I'm not in charge. Because boy, oh boy, give me an inch and I'll try for a mile on the control issue!  My lovely friend Ella advised me to talk to TBG about it. I did bring it up the other night, while I was laying next to him in the dark. (It's always so much easier to ask for a spanking in the dark)  I told him that I didn't want to feel I was pushing him into it, because it's his decision and I trust him. But then I got to thinking about how I conveniently reminded him a couple of times in the last week or so that I hadn't been spanked. So, there I was trying to control our dynamic already. Sigh. 

And yet, I NEED that reminder spanking. I'm starting to feel like I need something weekly. I can tell you that I know by about 10 days I'm feeling anxious and ready. I can feel the old me try to creep back in. And I don't want that! I would honestly rather sit on a hot seat for a day and be reminded of his love and dedication to us than to let any of the old me creep back in. 

Because I can tell you, it's been lovely here. So full of intimacy, love, sexiness, peace, joy, safety, and contentment. All wrapped up in one. I've said to a couple of blogger friends that it's like I'm falling in love all over again. And this new dynamic we have is just what I need, so I definitely don't want the old Maggie showing up!

But I'm still not sure TBG gets the need I have for a spanking yet. And I don't want to badger him. Other than that, it's nearly been idyllic. It's that missing piece, that rosy, hot bottom, which brings me back to center. How do I ask for it without sounding pushy? Or not make him feel like he's doing something wrong? Or that I'm not trying to control things...even though I probably am? Gah. And then to even ask for one? Yikes, I can barely talk about it with the lights out sometimes, lol. 

Hopefully this last piece of the puzzle will fall in place soon.  

A Little Wednesday Ditty

There is a little devil

That lives inside of me.

She likes to poke and prod

And bring calamity.

She doesn't mean to anger

(Not necessarily)

But she sure does like

To make you stutter 

And gasp in disbelief.

It's not that she's a bad sort,

In fact, she's really sweet.

She just has a very bad habit

Of getting in the hot seat.

I try to keep her hidden 

But much to my dismay

She tends to brighten up with moxie 

And begs to come out and play.

You can see her in my smirk

And the twinkle in my eyes;

My lilting laughter follows the mischief 

Of her many fearless tries.

I pray, dear husband,that you can see

The humor in her aim.

I'd truly hate for my behind

To take the awful blame. 

Red is so much a better color

On my head

Than on my bottom

All aflame. 

XOXO

Shocked and Awed

It happened. 

I'm still in a bit of a daze that it happened, but happen it did.

For some strange reason every time I picture a spanking it's either from "I Love Lucy" or from a Tom and Jerry cartoon. Not sure why LOL. 

Can you believe it?!? I barely can!

Friday morning, The Big Guy and I ended up being all alone in the house. The kids had already left for school and I had crawled back in bed before work for a little snuggling. TBG started getting a little amorous and next thing I know my butt is in the air and he's got my legs pinned. Well, apparently he took that moment to think, "hmmm...she's been asking for this and I said I would work on it, so, here goes!" Imagine my surprise when the man who refused to spank started spanking me! At first I was thinking, "ok he wants to try a fun spanking - I'm good with that." But then the sparks got harder...and he began to speak. 

People, he LECTURED me! I think my jaw almost dropped! And everything he was saying was spot on. He was PERFECT. I couldn't have asked for anything better for our first time. And I couldn't believe it was happening - finally!! I was shocked and awed, I tell you. But I immediately put my head down and accepted it. I knew it was what I had asked for and what I needed. It was what he needed me to do, I think, too. When he asked me a question I answered. I felt like answering with "yes, sir" but couldn't bring myself to do it as I was worried it would throw him off.  I didn't want to do that. 

The best part (other than finally having this happen)? He ended by putting his body on top of mine and asking if I knew how much he loved me. And I do. This is a man that will do this for me even though he's still unsure and may feel silly doing it. I'm telling you, he was perfect. Then came the loving. Yessiree. Lots of loving this weekend. Have I told you how much I love this man?

And now I have to keep the lines open. Keep talking about this. Tell him how much I loved it and him. I love when he gets his dominant side on and I want to show him that. My submissiveness comes so much easier to me when he is feeling dominant. I have to find a way to help build that. I'm sure it's easier said than done. And I'm sure we're still going to struggle. But at least it finally happened!

Thank God!!

Outside of his box

I don't always fit into a box. You could say I'm a square peg trying to fit into a round hole at some times. I don't like people trying to fit me into categories or anything. I am who I am: a complex, eclectic, loving, smart-assed wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend. So, don't try and fit me into a mold. It just won't work. 

The Big Guy knows this. He does. But I think he realized it again this past week. Unfortunately, it took me yelling and crying and having a minor melt down to get him to understand it in a new way. A DD way. 

You see, I've been putting ttwd on a back burner as we couldn't even talk about it. I would get angry. He would get frustrated. I kept waiting...and waiting for TBG to have this surgery he has needed. This is something that we knew would help him physically and possibly emotionally.  I kept telling myself I knew change would come, but that I couldn't expect it right away. I kept telling myself that I just needed to bide my time, not push him. 

We were on a morning walk, talking about stuff we are looking forward to this summer. Somehow or another the subject came up about the books I read. And it can up in a derogatory way. If you don't know it yet, I read a lot. A LOT. So much so that I've gotten myself in trouble before (and am still grounded from buying books). Well, TBG basically said that I need to stop reading "those" books (DD or BDSM) because I was getting ideas of things he couldn't live up to. And that I needed to live in reality and not be like my sister. 

Now, as a background please know that my sister made a decision we didn't agree with.  She basically left her husband because he wasn't giving her what she needed. She ended up being more into bdsm, if you will, than he was. And that's fine! I certainly don't judge, especially about stuff like that. But before she passed away she ended up leaving her husband for another man. And that's not me. And TBG was equating me reading dd or bdsm stories with her doing the same. And then basically saying I needed to stop reading the books because it was giving me all kinds of ideas he couldn't meet. 

Well, I was incensed, let me tell you!  First of all, that's not what THIS (me wanting dd) is about at all. AT ALL.  I know life is different than the books and believe me, I'm good with that. I don't want a fantasy, I want a reality. And here's the thing: from reading these books I somehow found these blogs. And from reading these blogs I found out- finally, after so many years! - of who I am (submissive) and what I need to be a better person, wife, mother (boundaries; discipline). 

I told him how mad I was in no uncertain terms. I couldn't believe he was equating me with my sister. He was basically belittling me, thinking this was a phase even though I finally know myself. And I told him - I've stuck by you through everything...I've been behind you, a cheerleader, a helper, someone who lifts you up and tries to help you through anything. And I finally ask for one thing - ONE THING- that I know will make me a better person and our marriage stronger and you won't have anything to do with it because it is outside of your box. And I'm not fitting in to his precious box of how life should be. 

After that I walked away. I couldn't even speak anymore. I thought to myself "what am I going to do now? I shouldn't have yelled at him but I guess it doesn't even matter. Where do I/We go from here?"

Lo and behold he comes in the house a few minutes later. He pulls me into a hug and says, "You're right and I'm so sorry." I can't even tell you the shellshock feeling of joy, peace, and disbelief that co-mingled at that moment. He talked to me briefly (because I was getting ready for work) about how this is hard for him because he feels silly doing it - he is not sure what to do. And since he feels silly he stays away from it (he is not a silly man). 

It was an uplifting moment for me. To have him, for that second, possibly understand what this means to me. We haven't talked about it since as I have been processing it.  I'm almost afraid to bring it back up again lol. But at least I know he is open to it...he's just stuck on the how, I think. And I'm not sure how to get him there. But I will talk to him about all of this. I can't just let it go. It's too important. I've finally found the box I probably should be in. 

Anyone have decorations for my pity party?

A pity party. Pretty sure that's what I'm throwing myself over here. 

I'm so depressed and a little bit angry. Why am I angry? Why, because I'm not getting my way. Well, and because I promised my son something that I now have to renege on. 

Ugh. 

And it's my fault.  Which makes me so upset with myself. 

Ok, let me give you a little background. My son is turning 13 tomorrow (Side note: I cannot believe my baby is a teenager!). Within the last few weeks I have told him that we could have a birthday party for him and about 9 of his friends. He wanted it at SkyZone - a place full of trampolines where you can play dodgeball. The cost? $250. Way more than we usually spend. However, we had just thrown a surprise party for my daughter's 17th and I spent way more than that. TBG does not know how much that party ended up costing us 😁. I've just never truly mentioned the price I added it up to be. I know, I know. Not cool. Not honest. Fine, I know I should tell him. I can hear you all! 😝

Anyway, I promised my boy a party. Well, I've given up all final financial decisions to TBG. It was my choice. That's how I want it. He is the HoH. Well, the HoH says no. It's too expensive. And I am TRYING so hard to not do what I usually do and push...make him feel like he has to agree with me. I used to be able to do whatever I wanted. I was in charge! Now, I'm not. And I want to submit so gracefully. I really do. But right now my submission on this is about as graceful as falling down stairs. 

I'm having such a hard time with this. I'm by no means a crier and I'm actually a little teary-eyed. Oh my, I just want to say, "yeah, well I'm doing it anyway!"  But I can't. I want to beg him to just take some extra money from savings. But that's not what he needs me to do. TBG needs me to support his decisions. Even though this is not the decision I would make.

I'm so broken-hearted that I have to tell my son we can't do it! Is there anywhere else we can go? Nope, every other cool 13-yr-old boy thing is about the same price. I don't want to have a party at my house because there's nothing fun for them to do here plus we have a small house and a small yard. Again, ugh. 

So, here I am. Struggling in my submission. Wanting so hard to just do what I want. But I'm not a child. I'm a submissive wife. My voice has been heard and taken into account. It just hasn't been agreed with. Has anyone else ever felt this way? I feel like it's so hard for me sometimes because The Big Guy had been checked out for so long and I just did what I could (and many times, what I wanted). I ran it all. And while I DON'T want that anymore it's a struggle to....well....not get my way, I guess. 

I'm sure that I will feel better after a little bit. I'll try to figure something out. And then I'll take down my decorations for this pity party and move on. 

Blessings to you all,

Maggie

Getting caught up

Ugh.

Do you know how hard it is to think of something to write about after being inactive for months? 

It's not that I don't have much to say as it is I have SO much to say. Too much to put into one blog.  So, I think I'll just skim over stuff..

A lot has happened in the time I wasn't here. There were times I thought, " I have to blog about that!" But, then I ran out of time. Sometimes I feel like there needs to be another 10 hours in the day for me to get stuff done. Let's get real though....I would just spend more time reading. Lol

So, here's a quick rundown of what's been going on:

1.  I've been pretty good about buying new books without asking. I only say "pretty good" because I discovered Kindle Unlimited on Amazon. So I'm trying my free month. I don't think I'm going to continue with it though as my favorite authors aren't on there.  However, I'm still reading too much I think.

2.  I was very proud of myself a couple of months ago.  I helped TBG out with something for which he was grateful. He asked what he could do for me. My response? "I want a kitty."

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, even though I could have asked for jewelry or a clothes shopping spree, I asked for a cat. Why? Because I looooove cats. I used to have two cats when we were first married and I miss them.  The problem is, The Big Guy....he doesn't like cats. He got stuck on litter patrol when I was pregnant and after that I just kind of..well..let him continue. And I shouldn't have. Because now he really doesn't want to have a cat again. So, I calmly pleaded my case and then, hearing voices which may have come from blog land, I told him that was all I was going to say and he had the final decision. And I wouldn't push him on it. He was very pleased with my reaction. And, I swear, I've only teasingly said a couple of things to him in the last few months since, and usually when he would bring the subject up. I'm still waiting on a kitty, but I haven't totally given up hope!

3. TBG had some major surgery about 3 weeks ago. I'm a worrier, so this was a little rough. He's doing great, by the way, and I'm so proud of him for how he handled (and is handling) everything. His attitude is so much better already and all of a sudden his palm seems to be finding my butt a lot.  And I am not complaining!! LOL. It's not disciplinary or reaffirming his place, it's just some fun taps. But I am so hopeful for the future because of it! Who knows? I feel like we may have a chance to talk about it now where before TTWD  wasn't something brought up. He didn't want to talk about it. This surgery was something that he had been looking forward to (odd, right?) and moving forward  he has a great view of how he wants our life to be. I'm so on board with it. Fingers crossed for the palm slaps to turn into more of what I need!

So, between the surgery and everything the kids were doing I seemed to just run out of time each night. And, truly, that sucks. One of the main reasons I started blogging was because I was hoping for friends who shared a belief in this lifestyle. People I could laugh with, commiserate with, lift up, and laugh with again. And not just about TTWD but about everything else because we are all more than just this one thing. Unfortunately, I'm pretty shy, so I don't put myself out there often. Which, I guess, can make it difficult to find new friends that you can have a lasting relationship with. 

But here I am again, putting myself out there! I'm not going to stop. I may not be able to post every week, but post I will. The future is looking bright. And I want to share it. 

Hello. My name is Maggie and I'm a book addict.

We're moving slowly, but at least we're moving!  One day at a time, you know?

The last few weeks have been a time for me to listen to The Big Guy and a time to rein myself in. It's been hard a few times. I'm not gonna lie, I like to get my way... Do what I want.  But that's not what this here new life is about, is it?  Don't get me wrong, I pretty much put everyone else before me. Especially TBG, DD, and DS.  But I like my "me" time and that comes with books. And I haven't been allowed to buy any new books for the last two weeks. It's like going thru withdrawal. I feel like a drug addict who hasn't had their latest hit. 

But this withdrawal, this.... downtime....is good for me. It helps me focus on things I need to focus on right now. And one of those things (the main thing) is to show TBG my submissiveness. Especially in something he knows is hard for me. 

I do have plans to ask if I can spend some money on books the next payday. I'm not sure if I'll be allowed. And if I'm not, well I'll just focus on the next two weeks and what my submissiveness means to me, him, and our marriage.  And I'll try not to whine or get pissy about it. 

But MAN, I want some new reads!! LOLOL 

Like I said, one day at a time. 

Back in the blog saddle again

Take a seat, grab a drink...relax!  This is a long one! LOL

It's been a year since I asked for this dynamic in our relationship.  A year since it was implemented.  I say implemented lightly because I'm not sure it was ever truly taken seriously by myself or my husband.  There have been moments it has worked for us and others where it fell flat.  I think as the year has gone on we've once again gone back to our corners to lick our wounds.  Both of us have had our own issues to tackle this year.  TBG has become withdrawn very frequently and is angry with himself for weight gain.  It ends up affecting all of us in the house.  And he knows it.  He hates it, too, but it's a vicious cycle and he circles the drain of depression. 

For my part, this year brought some health problems which I've finally come to realize were spurred on by my own depression.  Have you ever not realized you were depressed until months later you look back and say, "Oh! Well, that makes sense now!"  I realized some time in October that I had been in a serious depression for the most part of 2014 due to my sister's death.  I never realized it - I just kept plugging away at daily life knowing that I had to put one foot in front of the other.  Life went on, so I had to.  You still try to smile and laugh and engage your children & husband...but deep down you're a complete mess that is nearly devoid of emotion because you have TOO MUCH emotion to handle.  

Does that make sense?

In any case, it ended up stressing me out and causing many migraines and a couple of scary moments.  It almost seems that I was waiting for the one year anniversary of her death.  Like if I could just make it past that, I could let go a little more.  And, oddly enough, it did help.  I feel like I'm slowly getting it back together.  Which is a good thing.

So, back to TTWD.  It's been on and off.  Mostly off.  But there are moments where I can tell he tries and so I do my best to submit at that moment.  Unfortunately, that's just about the only time I seem to submit.  Like I said earlier - I've been in my own corner licking my wounds.  So, I've fallen back into some of my "old ways."  Spending too much money before bills can get paid, not asking prior to buying Kindle books (I'm an addict! LOL), not doing what he asks, etc.  Bad.  Maggie.  Good God, I need some structure and consequences like you wouldn't believe.  And I try - I really do - but it's like this little red devil is on my shoulder sweetly whispering in my ear and I just follow along, skipping happily down Bad Girl Lane with only a slight warning bell jangling in my head.  I do so well.....and then I lapse in judgement.  I don't get it.  But seriously, if anyone needed DD it would be me!  UGH!!  I frustrate myself.  And then I stand there when he's upset with me and most times I feel like hanging my head and watching my toe draw invisible lines on the floor, knowing anything I say will not help my situation.  Because I was wrong.

I'm going to keep plugging away at TTWD, though.  2015 will be the year of submission for me.  I'm feeling much better and my main concern is to get my health back in shape.  For me, that includes a healthy mind which definitely includes submission.  I need it.  I want it.  It makes me feel....like who I always wanted to be.

And I'm going to kick this blog back up!  With the depression it got hard to even come online and read my favorite bloggers, let alone blog myself.  So, the DD blog hiatus is over.  I'm pulling my big girl panties up (and yes, they're quite pretty) and doing this thing.  My life, my story, is no less than anyone else's, even if I am envious of so many other's relationships in this blog land.  I just have to remember that others struggled in the beginning.  Nobody started this journey simply and easily.  My life is not a DD novel (much as I sometimes wish, ha ha!!) but it can be - and will be - even more fulfilling because it's MY life.  We just have to put a lot of work in to get it there.  And I'm hoping as I work on my submission and am actually doing what he needs me to do (because I've been a tad dismissive about a few things he's asked for help with) that it will move him to work on TTWD too.

Wish me luck.

Oh, and I hope everyone out there in blog land had a fabulous and meaningful holiday season!  XOXO

Maggie